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Some you know me as a strong mental person who has over come a lot in my life. But to be honest it's a everyday struggle not wanting to die an to air my own dirty laundry, yes I prefer playing videogames, an watching anime over stupid tv, from doing laundry or showering is a issues being in my shoes with my pain an recent stroke yes I wish it had taken me. Not gonna lie now being a borderline manic depression even with meds i still get the urge an being put down just sends me deep into the pit. Yes I can put on the fake smile an act ok. In the end will I make it who knows but after a stroke an the doctor says you literally living one day at a time you wonder if it's worth it. No I am not asking for pity or poor Rick I am simply saying an airing my own personal dirty laundry! Yes I have physical limits like walking an do y best to move an recoup. Does having a flamed sciatica help NO it's a bitch to walk an feeling like someone slammed a sledge into my left hip. Lower back is another issues from my scoliosis o
Cut me open and you'll find
A brain, heart, liver, lungs
And a knife in the spine
It's chilling to know that the last place you go
Might be where the fat lady sings
Does it hurt? I don't know, and where do we go?
We don't tease fragile minds with such things
So sell me down the river
First help me sell my soul
It's something I know I can deliver
I think we've finally broke the mould
It's getting harder to know if I'm sane
My issues are leaking outside of my veins
Somebody save me or end me
I haven't yet made up my mind
If it leads to paranoia, boy, you might want to hit the floor
Before exposure leads to a metamorphosis we can't ignore
Lost in the whisper and hung on a prayer
If you don't know where you're going
Any road will take you there
So sell me down the river
First help me sell my soul
It's something I know I can deliver
I think we've finally broke the mould
Will I be an end to someone's destiny?
Who's to know?
And will I give right in to my aggression?
Who's to know?
Will I fall apart all alone
Something for all to think about!!!
Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were ment to be there, they serve
some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson or help you figure out who you are and who you want to become.
You never know who these people may be; your neighbor, child, long lost friend, lover, or even a complete
stranger who, when you lock eyes with them, you know at that very moment they will affect your life in
some profound way.
And sometimes things happen to you and at that time they seem painful and unfair, but in reflection you
realize that without overcomeing those obsticales you would have never realized your true potential
strength, will power, and or heart.
Everything happens for a reason. Nothing happens by chance or by means of good or bad luck. Illness,
injury, love, lost moments of true greatness and sheer stupidity all occur to test the limits of your soul.
Without these small tests, whether they be events, illnesses, or relationships, life
saw the doctor today about my stroke an I am doing great so far!! ty for the support
Went to the ER couple days ago cause numb on my left side, per the on call doctor, so the ER was literally a mad house I left home around 11pm, didn't get back home till 6am an told my CT scan is normal an no idea why my left side was numb, sucks cause literally lost my gripping in my left hand (dropped my vape like nine times) an to top it off the day after my left leg gives out so slam full force on my knee twice an left side my mouth drools (so gross) an just fed up with living!
hope everyone has a great Easter an finally getting my diabetes an blood pressure decent
Just got out the hospital for issues with my insulin an blood pressure see the main doc in couple days to fix it
looking at major back surgery an can't say it ain't scary do to dealing with my spine an fusion so yeah a lot on my mind
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