God how I hate this walking on eggshells feeling. They are off and home for the weekend, and now I am feeling the tension tenfold.
I made more calls today, but yet there is nothing I can do about a place to stay or my medical records for the medical shit. The one clinic told me they should hear something Monday, which would be okay as long as I can go get them picked up and turned into dshs for my medical to be approved.
This stress here is eating me alive! I swear since she told me I had two weeks, I don't believe they have spoken more then 3 or maybe 4 sentences to me, and that was almost a week and a half ago. I refuse to be on the phone inside when they are here, I am trying my best not to piss them off in any way what so ever.
I am barely keeping it together, I swear I have bawled more the past few weeks then I have in a long frigging time. If one of these shelters would just say they have an opening coming up, it would take a huge load off my chest.
I feel like with all this going on, I have been acting selfish as a friend, cuz I know right now I can't take care of myself, how the hell am I going to be a friend to someone? I know bleh.......
I don't know what to do, nor do I know what to say anymore... I am sorry my status messages are so negative, but I can't seem to find any positiveness in any of this. Although I do attempt to try.
Someone once told me baby steps, but how the hell do you take baby steps when you feel like you are being thrown from the train?