ill never get to rock you while you sleep.ill never get to hold you while eat.ill never watch you grow up and ill never get to hear you call me mommy.people say it gets better with time..but it doesn't.it doesn't hurt any less, i don't feel any less at fault,i just feel sad.i try to do things to keep you off my mind, but i can't.i still dream of you with me and every time i wake up its so hard to tell myself thats all it was.. a dream.the hardest thing is knowing that we could have gotten away, if only i had known i had you on the way. People say i shouldn't get depressed and that its all going to be o.k.would you really feel that way if your child was gone? would you still honestly be able to look at me and say that your o.k? i don't think so.in fact i think if things were different and tables were turned you'd feel the way i feel everyday.
