Another year has come and is almost gone. It’s that time again to reflect back and see if I have accomplished anything this year.
From what I feel inside I would have to say NO. There are others out there that would probably say other wise but deep down I know I haven’t really done much but try and atone for something I shouldn’t feel guilty of doing.
Those that know me personally know that I have a very giving heart, and will do anything I can to help out a friend in need. Normally I can keep this in check and within reason, but after looking back upon this year, there have been quite a few instances where I should have held back. Then there is also a few that I helped that were not worthy of it.
I’ve come to the conclusion that I’ve been doing all of these things because I’m trying to atone for turning my back on a friend when they needed me. Earlier this year I cut lose a close friend because I had help them all I could and they felt it wasn’t enough. I had been friends with this person since I was in High school. He was apart of the family. Recently he fell on hard times and his own family ignored him. I tried everything I could to help him including having him stay with my family for a while. Well it was only suppose to be a couple of weeks and turn into 3 months. Now it’s not like this person was doing drugs (even though he is addicted to playing video games) he was just anti social, and had no people skills or common sense. He was starting to rub my family the wrong way and I had to remind him that he was only suppose to be with us a few weeks and that it was time for him to move on. When this happened he took it as a insult and had a major attitude. The friendship ended a week after he left stemming from and email argument about his last day with us. On his last day he not only did not say goodbye to anyone but he didn’t bother to thank anyone either. He didn’t thank my Aunt and Uncle for taking him to work everyday at 4:30 AM because the busses were not running yet. He didn’t thank my Grandmother for letting him stay as long as he did. He did even bother to thank me for anything. No thanking me or saying anything was fine I was use to it, but not saying anything to my Grandmother is not tolerated. After he left he clamed that it was my family’s fault and that they were wrong and that he was not the house guest from hell. Well all my inner circle of friends know that in my family the one person that is NEVER to be upset is my Grandmother. Any other member of my family could be mad at you and I wouldn’t care, but no one is allowed to upset my Grandmother, and he did to the point where she doesn’t even want him anywhere near her home. In the history of my family there is only one other person that is banned from my Grandmother’s house and that is my Sister. There comes a time in life when you can only help someone so much and then you have to let them go so they can continue on their own, Well this was a person I should have done that with a very long time ago. I finally understood why his family had done the same thing to him. Basically it was the only way he was/is going to learn.
Part of me still feels like I failed and that I could have done more for this person, hence the reason why I think I’ve been trying to help so many others that I have come across ever since. But I guess for the most part I’m glad I did it and would do it again in a heart beat. As for those that I have helped, I’m glad I was able to and I don’t regret that I did either, not even the ones that didn’t deserve my help.
I have done some other things this year such as Made lots of New friends and associates. Seen a Ton of movies with my Movie groups. Realized that I’m addicted to buying DVDs mostly Asian films and Anime (Thanks a lot B :P ). Worked in a Haunted house. That was great fun and I look forward to doing that again. I’ve been robbed (just stuff stolen from out of my car) not from me personally. I’ve come close to being replaced at work on several occasions. I passed my Certification for IBM BRMS programming. Thanks to a friend recently making me hand write letters. I’ve started thinking about writing again to clear my head hence the reason for writing this blog.
So I guess now that I’ve written all of this down and gone through it, I guess I have done some good things this year. Now all I need to do is begin to plan for what is coming up next year. Because by this time next year I want to be able to write a blog about what it’s like to be in a House that I own instead of in one I’m renting from someone.
So until the next Blog Everyone Take care.
C-man
