XaviRoseMaiden's blog: "poetry"

Being Mum

Before i thought i owned the world,

I was so spoilt... 

I had so much freedom but i never appreciated it ... 

I had so much love ... 

But i was selfish ... 

I had so much outer beauty.. 

but inside i was ugly... 

Then you came 

My whole world changed

I learned i did not own the world ... 

I had to learn to be humble.. 

I had love but from a distance... 

My beauty changed it wasnt about me every day .. 

it was about caring and helping you grow...learn , discover.. 

Loving you expanded my heart ... 

Losing you expanded my pain ... 

But now i have both ... 

I have in my life .. 

But i have days and days without you .. 

But i appreciate everything i have so much more then i did before ... 

Highsight , such interesting thing .. 

But you have to go through things to have it .. 

Everything i'm going through is part of the journey .. 

I refuse to regret a single moment because its forged me into who i am today .. 

And im still growing , still evolving ... 

I'm not enough for some ... 

I'm too much for others ... 

As for me .. 

I love me ... 

With a kindness, that i've never known before... 

 i wake up each day , to a new day .. 

And i refuse to give up!

Someone out there.. is needing exactly i have ... 

The thing about the people that know me well .. is they tell the truth , whether not .. 

I like to hear it ...

They dont tell me beautiful lies... 

They tell me the truth...

it's my choice whether or not i choose to accept it...

They push me , they challenge me ... They encourage me ..

And do my best to be a good friend ... 

 

Sometimes as a Mum , things come first .. 

Children have to come first .. 

Maybe soome  believe im wrong in that ... 

And some respect it ... 

I dont know how to explain it ... 

But i must take care of her till she's old enough to live on her own .. 

We dont always want to put the kids first , but its part of the eqaution...

We have to...

We all have those moent where we want to do crazy things... 

If i could how many times id been asked to move ...for love...

If could count how many times ive not gone a date ... because i had to put her first...

We go so long ... scarificing for our children ..

That sometimes its to remember what it is we want ...

 

Being  Mum isnt always glamourous

We look after children , when we grumpy...because thier too tired or hungry, etc 

We look after them when they are sick... and vomiting...

We look after them when someone hurts them ... either intentionally or not..

We look after them , when we are sick , and have no energy .. 

When we are so tired that we falling asleep... 

But we stay awake just a lil longer to read them a bedtime story we stay a lil longer sometimes just to make they go sleep...

We hug them ... we love them unconditionally..

Even when we are furious with them ..

The love never goes away...

But when night comes after they fall asleep..

Then its Mummmy time..

 

 

it isnt always rewarding in a sense that others can see...

But it  is incredible when you your child well...

When your child is  so happy thier eyes shine with pride...

I can't describle how it feels to just hang out with them .. and talk about thier life ... 

spend time with them .. doing things they love to do !

Laughing , joking ... etc 

Being  Mum 

Is amazing ... 

It will always be a part of me ... 

A good kind part of me ... 

I'll love her till the end of  time

And be forever in her heart ..

That's the one of the best part about being Mum 

once my physical body is gone .. 

My spirit , my words ,our precious moments .. 

Remain forever...

I love being Mum... 

I wouldn't it change it for the world...