BLONDE JOKES.....
Q: What's the difference between a prostitute, a nymphomaniac, and a blonde?
A: The prostitute says, "Aren't you done yet?"
The nympho says, "Are you done already?"
The blonde says, "Magnolia...I think I'll paint the ceiling magnolia."
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Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a rooster?
A: In the morning a rooster says, "Cock'll-doodl-doooo", while a blonde says, "Any-cock'll-doooo."
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Q: Why did the blonde scale the glass wall?
A: To see what was on the other side.
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Q: What do you do when a blonde throes a hand grenade at you?
A: Pull the pin and throw it back.
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Q: What do you get when you offer a blonde a penny for her thoughts?
A: Change
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Q: How does a blonde high-5?
A: She smacks herself in the forehead.
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Q: How do you amuse a blonde for hours?
A: Write 'Please turn over' on both sides of a piece of paper.
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Q: Did you here about the blonde who shot an arrow into the air?
A: She missed.
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Q: To a blonde, what is long and hard?
A: Grade 4.
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Q: Why do blondes take the pill?
A: So they know what day of the week it is.
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Q: What does a blonde say when you ask her if her blinker is working?
A: Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No.
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A blonde saw a "¿" on her computer screen and asked another blonde,
"How do you do that?" She responded . . .
"Simple, turn the keyboard upside down!"
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A blonde phoned her b/f in despair. "I'm doing a jigsaw puzzle,and i can't fit any of the pieces together." "Whats the puzzle of?" he asked. "It's of a big rooster and i can't get any of it together. None of the edge pieces will fit.Please come and help me." When the b/f arrived she directed him to the kitchen. "The pieces are all over the kitchen table" she wailed. He took one look at the problem and said "Honey,put the cornflakes back in the box."
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A blonde went into a library and shouted: "I'll have a burger and fries please!" The librarian looked at her and said, "Do you mind,this is a library!" The blonde realized her mistake and whispered, "I'll have a burger and fries please."
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What do u call a blonde with a balloon on her shoulder? Siamese twins.
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The blonde came in from the kitchen with a look of bewilderment on her face. "I don't know whats happened" she told her boyfriend, "I was rinsing some ice cubes a few minutes ago and now i can't find them!"
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What do u call a blonde grabbing at air? Collecting her thoughts....
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Did you hear about the blonde virgin? She hangs out with the easter bunny and santa claus...
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Why did the blonde climb onto the roof?
She heard drinks were on the house...
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Two blondes were driving to disneyland. On their way they saw a sign on the freeway which said, Disneyland left. So they turned around and went home.
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A college tutor asked the group "Whats the capital of Nebraska?" "Thats easy" said the blonde student, "N!"
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Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice? Because it said "concentrate"
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BLONDE:"Excuse me, what time is it?"
MAN: "Two-thirty"
BLONDE: "Gee,thats wierd. Ive been asking that same question all day and every time i get a different answer."
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A man was impressed that his blonde g/f was able to paint her apartment without help. "You're doing a great job" he said, "but theres just one thing that puzzles me. Why are u wearing a ski jacket over ure fur coat?" "Because"she replied,"it says on the can,'for best results put on two coats.'"
