Ok I'm stressing out here, having fucking problems and who the fuck do I have???? No one. The only person I really have here is Duane, that's it. I have nothing, nothing at all.
So I'm bitching once again. When I lived 2 1/2 hrs. away and worked full time... I made time to be with him. Drive all that way, tired, broke after making the trip.. yadda yadda.. stayed up late when i had to wake up early hoping he would get online. Where the fuck is that for me?????? Am I fucking greedy that I just expect the same back? Am I a fucking bitch for this? I don't know honestly, I'm always told that I'm over reacting or I just don't get heard.. well by one person that is. I'm sick of it! I can't do shit about it either b-c I will look like a "Psycho" especially to his alcoholic ass roommate that is a fuckin piece of shit that tries to split us up and say I'm too immature for duane.. WELL GUESS FUCKING WHAT BUDDY!
1. Don't pull that immature shit on me, cuz if you were any kind of man, you would stay out of the fucking situation between us because we were just having fun!
2. Are you psycho jealous that you wish you had what we had?
3. Anothing thing, if you were any kind of man, wouldn't you have the balls to say shit too my face? Who's the little middle school bitch now?
Anywho, I've heard apologies from Duane, they don't mean shit until i see actions taken in his attitude toward our relationship. I mean I'm taking it seriously, i fucking love this man.. but I don't know what to think.... is he pushing me away? is he seeing someone else? does he not want to be with me? is he playing a long ass game with my emotions?????? over 2 yrs of being fucking careless...
I JUST DON'T FUCKING KNOW.. argh I'm glad no one is going to read this blog, I mean who would? .. haha this was a waste of time!