I thought that my mom had gone crazy. My godson/cousin called to tell me that he had proposed to his girlfriend. At the time, I was with my mom, taking my youngest back to his mom's. I let everyone know who was with us, mentioning to my cousin who I was with, so that he didn't waste his time trying to contact the others.
After I hung up, my asked why he didn't call her first? My cousin's mother, my mom's sister, had passed away a few years ago, and we all sort of pitched in and helped him out when he needed it. He lived with our grandma, and my other aunt, since she lived closer, was then appointed his guardian.
The more she talked about it, the more and more pissed she got about it. She calmed down some when I told her that I told him that she was with me, but she was peeved that he didn't call her first. Come to find out, her cell carrier was having issues that day, so he couldn't get thru.
It got me thinking, and I realized where I got my selfishness from. I admit it, in my personal life, I have my selfish moments. But looking back, I realized two things...1) There are things I need to change so I'm not like her...and 2) She's friggin crazy, because my kids, after spending time with her, have a whole different history of my childhood than I remember it.
I'm not boo hooing, saying I had a horrible childhood, because I didn't in many ways. I admit I'm a mess, but with the two looney tunes I grew up with, I now realize that I am way better off than I should be.
But my fondest memories were spent with my grandma. I was there every weekend, because I never really saw eye to eye with my adopted dad. He wasn't physically abusive, but spent a good part of my life making me feel guilty, or afraid of everything. Let me tell you, not a great way to raise your kids.
And he was a control freak, so every chance my mom go out from under his thumb, she had to push her personality and views on everyone around her. Which was me, being an only child. I had two stepsisters who were rarely around, so I got way more attention than I wanted.
So now that my dad has died, she has nobody to keep her in check, and there has been hell to pay. The capper was I got to listen to her all day yesterday, and my cousin's engagement party, tell me how she didn't think that I needed surgery, and needed a good chiropractor, and she was just looking out for my own good, because she cared.
When I called her to talk to her about what my doctor said, she said "I hate to cut this short, but I'm golfing" and hung up..
Hug your mom's, and thank them for not being mine
