“How To Keep A healthy Level Of Insanity And Drive Other People Insane”
At lunchtime, sit in your parked car and point a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
Page yourself over the intercom (Don't disguise your voice)
Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits. Always wear them one day after your boss does. (This is especially effective if your boss is of the opposite gender.)
Send e-mail to the rest of the company to tell them what you are doing. For example: "If anyone needs me, I'll be in the bathroom."
Put mosquito netting around your cubicle.
Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
Send e-mail messages that advertise free pizza, doughnuts, etc., in the break room. When people complain that there was nothing there, lean back, rubs your stomach, and say, "You've got to be faster than that."
Reply to everything someone says with "That's what you think."
Finish all your sentences with "in accordance with the prophecy."
Don't use any punctuation.
Ask people what sex they are.
Specify that your drive through order is "to go."
Sing along at the opera.
Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.
