I have not right or reason to be though. The thing I hate most about being single, is jealousy. I'm amost never very jealous when I have a girfriend. Actually, I'm very secure and not really jealous at all when I have a girlfriend. It basically only happens when I don't have one. I absolutely hate the emotion. Totall atleast mostly irrational anger and sadness combined.
It's weird. It makes me want to get back together with someone, but then I remember why I broke up with them. Have I already had the best I can get though? Should I really keep looking for that dream/fantasy person of mine? Are they even out there, and if they are, would they even like me? I'm less than half a year away from 30. It sounds weird to me. After 30 I'll just feel like an old creepy guy.
Normally my selfesteme is through the roof. It's just bad the last couple of days, especially since my nightmare. Working and getting paid and stuff is supposed to help, seems like. I just worked around 20 hrs. People there probably thought I was creepy cuz I was so quiet. I don't talk much, especially while I'm working. People find my quietness disturbing often times. I don't find most people interesting enough to want to talk to them.
Hopefully I'm just tired, and wornout, and depressed due to that. Hopefully I'll feel better after I sleep and wake up. I guess we shall see...