I feel like I'm stuck in this stand still. So much happened last year and I just wish that I could erase it all and start out my new year. But I don't feel like I can. I still feel stuck in 2006. A year where the asshole were the good guys and the good guys...well, it just makes me think of the saying...bad guys lie to get in your pants, good guys lie to get in your heart. I don't know what's worse. And when do we hit that point where we repeat a lie so much that it become true to even ourselves? We convience ourselves that something is wrong and we believe it, that someone loves us or that we love someone, and we fall, even if we hadn't meant to. That friends is enough...that we are finally over it...that we don't cry ourselves to sleep anymore...that it doesn't really hurt...
We are always lying to ourselves and others for the better of everyone, but it is really better. When did honesty become so scary?
This is my lesson from 2006, that truth is dead. Because we are too damn busy hiding it that we don't pay attention and we lose it. It's lost, it's staving, it's dead.
Call me bitter, say I'm wrong, but don't deny the little part of yourself that can't help but wonder if I'm right.