There is not much that can make me hurt but I would have to say that recently I have been thrown into some horrible moments... I should be writing right now but it’s become so hard to write when my muse is gone. *Sighs* what to do huh? Moving on is the only thing to do but why is it so hard? You know something... I can’t watch romantic movies or comedy’s that end in the romantic way... it actually hurts to watch them, how sad is that! I feel like I need to rant but really I don’t know what to be mad at... I mean I was told it would all end like this but did I listen? No... I ignored it because I thought this was what I had been searching for... I was wrong.
However I think I might know where my end is... that thing I have been searching for, for so long I can feel it getting closer! I’m sure it’s in Nova Scotia Canada! I’m sure this is good news for someone.
I just wish I knew and end to all the pain that deep inside me, that pain I thought I was finished with! This pain should have never come back I thought I had found me end. Found that sweet bliss I have been searching for ever since that night on the cliff...but I was wrong, it’s funny when you really think about it I mean *Shakes my head sadly* I’m not sure what I’m even talking about anymore... everything is just so hard and confusing for me I don’t even feel like a good Alpha anymore, I have lost my teeth it seems.
I would not say that I have become weak per say, more that I simply no longer care about anything. I find it hard at times to feel anything at all, regardless who I am talking to sometimes I simply can’t feel anything *Slumps in my chair* so they say there is a reason for everything but I don’t see it... what was the reason behind what’s going on in my life? Tell me that one.... why is it its happening to me now? You can’t answer that!
I am sorta happy, I know you are a wonderful woman my kitty and I will do better for you ^_^ when I actually get to talk to you..... I tell you long distance is a killer lol....
Anyway I’m not feeling this blog right now... so ima go... talk soon ya’ll!