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Maintain Physical Contact
Always maintain physical contact with the person receiving the massage once you begin. It is very disruptive of the physical bond that develops if you take both hands off her body at the same time, and placing them back can be somewhat of a shock. With practice you may become aware of the sexual energy that flows between you and your partner. Sounds strange, but it is true. Have everything you need within reach of your free hand. It is also a good idea to touch her knee, then slide your hand up to her inner thigh, then finally her up to her vulva, so as not to penetrate her personal space too quickly. Placing your cold hands directly on her vulva may be a shock and ruin the mood. Warm, in a bowl of warm water, any lubricant you may use prior to applying them to her vulva.
Basic Techniques
You will be massaging her clitoris using one, two, or three fingers. The size and prominence of her clitoris will determine how many fingers you use. If you are able to locate and feel her clitoral shaft with your fingers, you will use your thumb and index finger. If she has a well-developed clitoris you may want to use your thumb, your index finger, and the finger next to that. If you cannot grasp the shaft and glans of her clitoris because it is small or hidden, you will use just the tip of your index finger, or perhaps your thumb.
If you can grasp her clitoris with two or three fingers you will want to do the following. Very gently grasp the shaft of her clitoris with your thumb and index finger. Gently slide the loose tissue covering her clitoris around, primarily back and forth, getting a feel for the shape and firmness of her clitoris. Determine how much the tissue along her shaft slides around. You do not want to grasp the glans at first if possible; if her clitoris is small you will not be able to avoid it. As you slide your fingers back and forth along her shaft, the hood should also be sliding back and forth, stimulating her glans. Go slow and watch your partner for indications of whether or not she is enjoying what you are doing. Try to maintain eye contact with her if possible, or as much as possible. If you cannot tell by body language, then ask her if what you are doing feels good. Ask her whether you should be going slower or faster, or applying a firmer or lighter touch. After you make the suggested change, ask again. If she does not know, just experiment but keep communicating.
If you cannot grasp her clitoris, you will want to place the tip of your index finger on top of her clitoral body or hood. Experimentation will indicate which is most sensitive. You will want to gently move the tissue under your finger around in small circles, or back and forth to stimulate her clitoris. Hopefully you will feel the firm structures of her clitoris under your fingertip, when she is aroused and erect, even if her clitoris is really small and hidden.
Continue to stroke her clitoris. If she is enjoying what you are doing just continue in a steady rhythm. As she becomes more and more aroused you may want to slowly and gently increase the amount of pressure you are applying, but always be gentle. The speed of your strokes can vary to, very slow in the beginning, then possibly faster as she nears orgasm. Your fingers should always be grasping the loose skin covering the body of her clitoris, causing it to slide back and forth along the shaft. Continue until she reaches orgasm. As soon as she has an orgasm switch to a very very light stroke, as her clitoris is likely to be very sensitive, or move your fingers to her labia. After a couple minutes you can begin again or stop. Never stop the massage abruptly unless she reports she is too sensitive to touch, in which case caress her vulva or inner labia for few minutes. Maintain physical contact as she comes down from her orgasm.
