Let's just say I had a 'fun' night, last night...but something interesting happened after I had come down from the immediate excitement: it was regret/lack of fulfillment/ and sorrow. I've never really had that. Engaging in 'fun' on a wkend, usually is great. I'm a guy, right! But not this time...as I was driving home, that feeling of 'lack of fulfillment' was already there. I think, I'm at that point in my life where meaningless 'fun' is no longer fulfilling. I'm 24 and have been in relationships, but never really in love. I've cared about girlfriends in a special way, but I've never fully put my heart all the way out. I guess it was a protective mechanism for me, so I wouldn't be hurt. And it worked for the most part. But with that, I don't think I've ever really experienced the joys and intimacy of being in love. I think I'm ready...because it's clear, I no longer want anything meaningless or less committed. I want to befriend, enjoy, and eventually love someone! I know it doesn't happen overnight, but I'm done avoiding/protecting myself from it. It's time to be a man and find mine...
