Just had a user come into my office and say "This government website is down, I wanted to know if someone could call them and find out when it will be back up"
First of all, why can't you? It doesn't require a degree to ask "When will you be back up?"
Then, like they would even tell you, because you know constant interruptions always make me fix things faster.
Yeah, I'll be so glad when I leave this place, I'm tired of being the master of the freaking internet.