The Original Joke of the DAy A man walks into a bar and says,"Bartender, give me two shots." Bartender says,"You want them both now or one at a time?" The guy says," Oh, I want them both now. One's for me and one's for this little guy here," and he pulls a tiny three inch man out of his pocket.The bartender asks"He can drink?""Oh, sure. He can drink." So the bartender pours the shots and sure enough, the little guy drinks it all up."That's amazing" says the bartender."What else can he do, can he walk?" The man flicks a quarter down to the end of the bar and says,"Hey, Jake. Go get that." The little guy runs down to the end of the bar and picks up the quarter. Then he runs back down and gives it to the man.The bartender is in total shock."That's amazing" he says,"what else can he do? Does he talk?" The man says"Sure he talks, hey, Jake, tell him about that time we were in Africa and you made fun of that witch doctor's powers!"
The Original Joke of the DAy Two guys were in a bar, and they were both watching the television when the news came on. It showed a guy on a bridge who was about to jump, obviously suicidal."I'll bet you $10 he'll jump," said the first guy."Bet you $10 he won't," said the second guy.Then, the guy on the television closed his eyes and threw himself off the bridge. The second guy hands the first guy the money."I can't take your money," said the first guy."I cheated you. The same story was on the five o'clock news.""No, no. Take it," said the second guy."I saw the five o'clock news too. I just didn't think the guy was dumb enough to jump again!"
The Original Joke of the DAy A truck driver, hauling a tractor-trailer load of computers, stops for a beer. As he approaches the bar, he sees a big sign on the door that says,"COMPUTER NERDS NOT ALLOWED - ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK!" He enters and sits down.The bartender comes over to him, sniffs, and says that he smells kind of nerdy. He then asks him what he does for a living. The truck driver explains to him that he drives a truck, and the smell is just from the computers he is hauling. The bartender serves him a beer and says,"OK, truck drivers aren't nerds."As he is sipping his beer, a skinny guy walks in wearing a pair of glasses with tape around the middle, a pocket protector with twelve kinds of pens and pencils, and a belt that is at least a foot too long. The bartender, without saying a word, pulls out a shotgun and blows the guy away. The truck driver asks him why he did that.The bartender replied,"Don't worry. The computer nerds are in season because they are overpopulating Silicon Valley. You don't even need a license."So the truck driver finishes his beer, gets back in his truck, and heads for the freeway. Suddenly, he veers to avoid an accident, and the load shifts. The back door breaks open and computers spill out all over the road. He jumps out and sees a crowd already forming, snatching up all of the computers. The scavengers are comprised of engineers, accountants and programmers - computer geeks. Each of them wearing the nerdiest clothes he has ever seen.He can't let them steal his whole load. So remembering what happened in the bar, he pulls out his gun and starts blasting away, killing several of them instantly. A highway patrol officer comes zooming up and jumps out of the car screaming at him to stop.The truck driver said,"What's wrong? I thought computer nerds were in season.""Well, sure," says the patrolman,"But you can't bait 'em!"
The Original Joke of the DAy A woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she had stayed by his bedside every single day. One day, when he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer. As she sat by him, he whispered, eyes full of tears,"You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you stayed right here. When my health started failing, you were still by my side. You know what?""What dear?" she asked gently, smiling as her heart began to fill with warmth."I think you're bad luck."
The Original Joke of the DAy 
A man walks into a bar and says,"Bartender,
The Original Joke of the DAy 
