for the past few years ive been fighting to get my friends to at least pretend to show they care. it never really worked. all they really ever did was use me whenever they needed something. ive met some new people and although they live so far away they make me the happiest ive been in years. people who care to hear what i say, and that try to make me feel better when no one else is around to listen. idk where things will go from here but i do know that no matter what happens these special people will always have a spot in my heart. and no matter what, no one can change the way i feel. this new feeling is the best in the world. thanks goes out to those who help. and special thanks to matt...who gives me the courage to move on and ignore those who dont deserve to have me around. its time to move on with my life, and its making me the happiest ive ever been in years.