PamelaMegan19's blog: "Poems and Whatnot"

"Tears sting My Eyes, cuz your leaving. Tears sting My Eyes Cuz I never stoped you. Tears sting My Eyes Cuz I know your gone Forever." By: Me Jan/26th/2006 "Friends Come And Friends Go Life Goes On Even If You Feel Alone Just Remember That Really Thier Still There Cuz As Long As You Remember Them, Thier Never Going To Leave You." By: Me Feb 18 2006 "My reality is shattering my heart is broken, how could he do this, how could he be so crul. He told me that he loved me but I found out it was never true, how could someone that I loved ever be so crule?" By: Me March 2006 "Life Can Bring You Happiness and Love, But then it rips it away. Thats Why I Turn My Back To It All And Wait For It To Fade Away" ~By: Me Aug 31st/2005 "You Told Me That You Loved Me, But It Was All A Lie. Now My Heart Is Broken And All I Want To Do Is Die."~By Me Sept 12th/2005 "Look at the people around you in them could be your best friend or your worst enemy but you'll never know unless you talk to them ~ Unknown" Sept 2nd/2005 "When Life Has You Down All You Can Do Is Stand Up And Try your Hardest Not To Cry"~ Unknown Sept 5th/2005 "Tears are in your eyes and I can tell the reason why your heart is broken, all becouse of a little lie that you kept deep inside now it's out and his love has died and all you want to do is shout" By:Me Jan/14th/2006 Once you told me that you'd always be my friend That nothing would ever cause our friednship to end Now things are different it's like you've changed your mind All thats going through my mind is will this heal in time I know I said some stupid things and I regret it now But what do you expect me to do when my feelings just come out I needed you and you were'nt there So maybe one day it will all come clear And together we will learn that neather of us was right Hopefuly we can be friends again and everything will be alright By: ME Augest 6th/2006 Once againg my heart sharters, and the pieces that have been put back together so man times lay on the floor. I don't see the point in picking them up anymore, the only answer now is to leave them there and let them get trampled. I've been walked on so many times before, you think I'de be use to it by now. But every time I get walked on it hirts more and more. Why does my heart always leave me crying behind a closed door. By: Me Sept 15th 2006

I Lay lifeless as I feel you touch me I've given up fighting You laugh stealing my innacince as the tears fall from my cheeks and hit the bed You come into my room in the dead of night and kill me inside I no longer know what it's like to feel anything besides the pain thanks to you no one will every make me smile You whisper in my ear your rotten thoughts of what this is sapose to be telling my I should enjoy the things you do to me but explain to me how? You've ripped my clothes and my soul never will things be the same how can I ever love knowing what you've done? knowing you could do it again... I've scream so many times for you to stop but it's like you can't hear all you know is you and nothing else matters as long as you get your pleasure when you finish you kiss my forehead take my sheets and tuck me in whispering I love you sweetie see you in the morning you look at me waiting for a response I look up at you knowing the words you want to hear I hear myself say them the words I hate so much "I love you too daddy" I watch you leave and wait quietly for your foot steps to fade I cry sightently into the night knowing that it will only happen again

She sits on her bed Pen and paper on her chest The gun lay on the pillow next to her head She begins to right her letter of death As her tears they fall To Whoever Cares My name is Leia and I lay here now gun next to my head Wondering….more like knowing how the world would be better off with me dead….. My mother doesn’t love me she never really did My father too was never ever there… I’m so lonely in this big world… I’m so forgotten People that I thought were friends are gone I wonder do they ever remember me? And will they once I’m gone? I’m sick of never knowing who will hirt me next My heart has been shattered, walked, on and smashed But never again will I have to worrie about people knocking on my door just to put me down I never have a reason to smile anymore Only reasons to cry But when I do cry I have no one to comfort me No one to dry my tears and say “Everything will be ok I’m always going to be here” So I leave you now with this tear stained letter As I reach for the gun and put it to my temple I can feel the cold steal against my skin For some reason it feels comforting I know now the pain, and tears will soon end Maybe in heaven I’ll have a Friend There are people I love but they don’t know So to them say I love you with ever little broken piece of my shattered heart Always I will think of you Even though you don’t know it you’re my world my everything I only wish I was able to tell you before now Because now is too late and I’m going to die Goodbye to the people who ready this and the people who don’t And remember to those of you who are going to think this is your fault it’s not Nothing ever is My name is Leia and tonight I'm going to be dead

Outside my door I hear her screaming please darling no more... Crack you can hear his belt hitting off my door as he brings it back to hit her somemore... I can hear her Weeping Her Weak little sobbs His voice is booming "You Fuckin Whore" Tears roll down my checks and I wish I couldn't hear as daddy beats mommy outside my door... Soon She'll be the one locked in here crying as daddy beats me outside that door... Everyday it's the same thing I go to school but no one ask about the bruses on my neck and face... I don't think they really care what happenes at my place you think the teachers would care enough to take on the task of helping...but like everyone else they also never ask Our Neighbour are oblivious to what happens inside those walls around them we act so nice and perfect daddy had us traind to be dolls Once again I hear her screaming outside my door but tonight is different he's not going to hirt us anymore I take the knife from under my bed and wait for him to come into my room so soon he will be dead he came I stabed now the deed is done and no longer do I have to listen to daddy beating mommy outside my door.....

Your fradgial heart was beating Then it slowly started to stop You realised you were bleeding But then your breathing stoped They called for help But no one came They cried your name But got no answer They saw you laying there All pale and cold Knowing who you were knowing your not that old Then the questions started And they all wondered why They didn't think you were sad None of them had seen you cry But I knew you better And maybe I knew why Why you desided It was your time to die You told me about the beatings The late midnight meetings You told me about the yealling And all the time spent screaming I wish I would have been there To take it all in I wish i would have been there But would have you even let me in Behind that locked door You sat on the floor Thouts of things in you mind I can only imagine that time Things they happen and can't be changed But still I have to wonder In this would full of blunder Will anything really matter in the end Your fradgial heart was beating Then it slowly started to stop You realised you were bleeding But then your breathing stoped By:Me(pamela) March 29th/2007 written in memorie of April April was an amazing person, but bescause of things happening, in her home life and other places she desided that to take her own life was the easiest way out....