"Such a pretty smile," you say, "you look so happy." I force another smile as I say, "Thank you." Thinking to myself, "Well, the smile has fooled another one." Going through life for so long with the pretty smile just to avoid the questions that hurt so much. If I keep smiling on the outside, maybe you won't see the pain on the inside. Maybe you won't see that on the inside I just want to crawl away and die. Perhaps you won't see my soul wilting like a neglected flower.....each day, becoming more and more brittle. Wanting so bad for the pretty outward smile to convince the hardened soul that happiness will come. But it never comes. The only thing that comes is more pain. Forcing me to build my protective wall even stronger than before.
But I'll keep smiling on the outside and crying on the inside. A way of life for me.
